The Irish have a reputation for telling great stories.
So much so, that (according to an Irish friend), the definition of a ‘fact’ in Ireland is:
“a story that is so good that it is retrospectively declared to be true”.
When you’re travelling it’s so easy to forget some of the essentials (or at least it seems that way to the travelling frogs…). So I really liked this little checklist card left on the pillow in our hotel in Geneva recently – no more panic in the morning for me when I realise my phone and laptop aren’t charged or I’ve missed a message. And some people I know suggested I underline the one ‘Have you thought of gifts for family and friends?’
“This one makes a net
This one stands and wishes.
Would you like to bet
Which one gets the fishes?”
(Chinese proverb)
A group of ladies (expatriates from a number of countries) recently visited a restaurant in the Languedoc, South of France. They loved the food and the place – only criticism was the demeanour of the waitress, who happened to be the owner’s wife. One of the group decided to give some feedback: on the way she out suggested that ‘a smile goes a long way’. The waitress responded. ‘I’ve been smiling. Now I’m washing up’
‘Everyone is kneaded out of the same dough, but not baked in the same oven’
(Yiddish proverb)
Some advice on the web for English speaking visitors to the Beijing Olympics in 2008:
‘Please don’t cross any railings lest suddenness happens’
Quite right too.
The world’s major religions all say something similar – this sign (spotted in Tamil Nadu, India) sums it up neatly.
I’ve never done a survey of what travellers talk about most – but if I did, I bet the subject of lavatories would be high on the list of topics. ‘Western style’ or ‘footprints’, or those amazingly engineered Japanese toilets. Are they/aren’t they clean, where can you find public loos anyway, why can you never find the right coins to operate them…
Here”s an addition to the stock of toilet stories.
In the recent local elections in France, one of the Candidates, a resident Englishman, was particularly concerned about the new hi-tech public lavatory in the village. He described it as a ‘disgrace’. Not because of the design, sleek and self-cleaning, or the positioning in the village square, but because of the instructions on the door. In French and German potential users are asked to pull the door open. In English, however, the instructions are to push. This, complains the English Candidate, is blatant discrimination – English speakers will arrive, desperate, and not be able to get in to make use of the sparkling new facilities. Before making this an election issue, the Candidate approached the Mayor. He, however, dismissed the matter. The English, he said, ‘can go piss in the next village’.
“The best time to plant a tree is yesterday. The second best time is now”
(Chinese proverb)
‘A language is…. a dialect with an army and a navy’, as Max Weinreich famously said (in Yiddish originally, ironically)
What about these signs then*?
And no, this is not travelling frogs’ contribution to the Scottish independence debate!
*helpfully translated by those lovely people at the Maryculter House Hotel near Aberdeen. Phew.
travelling frogs 